Originally Posted By Mary Poppins I was browsing through this book on happiness at Chapters yesterday. And, it seems we have a happiness "set" point. Even people who are deliriously happy upon getting married, usually return to their set point after a couple of years. (Don't tell them that will happen). I may go back and buy the book. I have heard that lottery winners are initially elated of course, but return to their set point of happiness in time.
Originally Posted By Goofyernmost >>>I have heard that lottery winners are initially elated of course, but return to their set point of happiness in time.<<< I would kinda like to be given the opportunity to prove or disprove that theory. Money cannot buy happiness, but you sure can have a good time shopping for it until you figure that out.
Originally Posted By avromark So I'm going to be depressed my entire life? Great. Money doesn't buy happiness it buys the means to happiness.
Originally Posted By Mr X That assumes that the "means" to happiness means being able to buy a bunch of stuff. The happiest I've ever felt in my life, and I can pinpoint several moments, all had NOTHING to do with money whatsoever. One time was when I was in a great jazz band playing great music for a bunch of people. Another was playing Chutes and Ladders with my daughter. Another was when I looked into my wifes' eyes and said "I love you" for the first time (she cried). Looking back, I do remember feeling relatively "hyped" when I landed some job or gig that paid well, but that wasn't really related to the money so much as it was something I wanted (a GOOD job that I was interested in). I can say with all honesty that I would not be elated to land a leaf raking job that paid $2,000 an hour. Sure, I'd be happy about the money. But I doubt I'd be all that excited about the method. In fact, I'd probably be pretty depressed about it, and stoic about "having" to do this to get that money. No, it's not all about the cash. Money can certainly buy comfort and security though. I can dig that.
Originally Posted By avromark Of course not if you were raking leaves you wouldn't be experiencing TDR at that time would you? It's about the Debit Card right? Happiness is a state of mind. However if you were in jail unjustly accused, I don't know how happy you can be. If you were terminally ill and in pain, I don't know how happy you can be. Like many things in life Happiness is complicated.
Originally Posted By Mr X ***However if you were in jail unjustly accused, I don't know how happy you can be.*** I think this is workable. Not easy, but workable. ***If you were terminally ill and in pain, I don't know how happy you can be.*** More difficult. But still potentially okay for happiness. You often hear stories about people who are really in high spirits in cases like this. Others, not so much. You never know til you get there.
Originally Posted By beamerdog I can remember one time when I was in DC working when I was deliriously happpy. It wasn't the money, it was literally that I was doing something that I was naturally good at, fulfilling, appreciated, and Loved doing. I remember crossing the street alone from the Air and Space Museum to the Department of Energy with a huge smile on my face.
Originally Posted By tinkerbell1962 Work-wise ... let's see I've had two "happy jobs". When I was a travel agent I was so happy to help families plan trips to DL, and of course I loved going on the FAM trips. I was sent to WDW for a week to attend several sales meetings and seminars. It was the best week of my life. It was incredible. Several years ago I had an amazing class of kids, the stars must have been aligned that year. They are now all in 3rd grade and all still love school and they are ALL in the top of their class. Most of them still tell me I am still their favorite teacher .
Originally Posted By Mary Poppins Interesting. I didn't know where this topic would lead but I recall happy times too that didn't require money. Still, you need a certain amount of money to live and to make happiness possible.
Originally Posted By beamerdog Mary, I think that people spend a lot of time at work. I've had other happy times not at work. too. btw, that job of mine paid peanuts.
Originally Posted By Lisann22 I took the question not to be about money and happiness but how we are hard-wired as human beings in regard to our happiness. And yes, I do think we have a set level to some degree. I just know too many people who defy logic in terms of their situation and degree of happiness. LOL! It also explains depression and how it affects some and not others. I think with work and understanding you can change your state of being though. I know for me, I'm not an outwardly jovial person. It's not my nature to be giddy or even to smile a lot but inside my happiness is plentiful. ;>
Originally Posted By beamerdog Ah, I see. >>I think with work and understanding you can change your state of being though.<< Interesting. Since my husband left, I have worked for almost 2 years to "alter" my inner being. The result - I've been walked over and taken advantage of more times than I'd like to admit. I came to this realization a few nights ago. I like myself the way I was. I am happy most of the time even when things around me are going south. I don't have too many of those ecstatic highs or lows, though. People sometimes take my honesty and speaking my mind with unhappiness. Not true. >> I just know too many people who defy logic in terms of their situation and degree of happiness. LOL!<< Yes! I would love for someone to develop an empirical measure of happiness. Now THAT would be interesting.
Originally Posted By Lisann22 <<<<People sometimes take my honesty and speaking my mind with unhappiness. Not true.>>> Oh man, you nailed it for me too beamerdog!!!
Originally Posted By Ursula My happiness is having the score at 20 and 7 at the end of the 3rd quarter. My future happiness depends on if anyone scores in the 4th.
Originally Posted By Ursula Hhahahahahahahhaahhahaa! Lisann22, I love ya, girlfriend. And not just because of the wine.
Originally Posted By mele I think money can sometimes help you find alternate ways of dealing with your unhappiness and can rule out certain kinds of stressful situations. In my case, if I won the lotto, I'd still be overweight. True, I could afford a personal trainer and chef but I still have to find the drive w/in myself to change. I think we do have to work to find inner peace and happiness. Sometimes you have to force yourself to see a better day, force yourself to keep your mind and emotions in check. Sometimes we can spend money to make ourselves happy but that is only fleeting happiness if you don't have the happiness w/in yourself.
Originally Posted By Mary Poppins I'm going to go back to Chapters and try to find the book. It was displayed near the front of the store but I don't know if I can find it.
Originally Posted By avromark Chapter's you're so *Canadian*, BTW does Chapter ever turn on their fireplaces? Come on if McDonald's can have their fireplaces on why can't Chapters? Happiness is a bitter pill.
