Originally Posted By RoadTrip Our daughter graduated with her Bachelors degree last May and was hired for a good position (utilizing her degree) at the U of M during June. She has decided to live with us for two years while she saves for graduate school. We paid 100% of her expenses for her undergrad degree, but have told her graduate school is on her dollar. She plans to live with us for two years saving money and waiting for her boyfriend to graduate. Then they will decide where they want to live and continue their education (he wants a PhD so he can be a college professor). The surprising thing is our daughter gets all kinds of garbage from some of her co-workers about still living at home. Is it really that weird? We love having her at home. It helps her save for graduate school, and after spending the past four years away at school she really doesn't know anyone locally that she would want to share an apartment with. And you want to know something? My wife and I totally enjoy having her live here. She is never a problem for us... in fact she usually goes to bed earlier than we do since she has to arrive at work an hour earlier. We also enjoy being with her again after her spending four years away at school. Honestly, besides the fact that we love the heck out of her, she is a very intelligent and interesting young woman and the conversation opportunities around here are GREAT!! So are we nuts? Is our daughter nuts? Why do so many people seem to think that our daughter really shouldn’t be living with us any more? I would love to hear your opinions (even though it won't change what we are doing!!).
Originally Posted By debtee I think it's lovely that you are enjoying your Daughter's company once again. I wish more parents felt like you do and then maybe the wouldn't be so many unhappy teenagers around! Good on you Trippy what a great Dad!
Originally Posted By avromark U of M as in Manitoba? Michigan? Minnesota? Couldn't you have paid for my undergrad? Being a TA was fun but the pay... Tenured prof, I wouldn't mind I've spent enough time in labs and classes. <<The surprising thing is our daughter gets all kinds of garbage from some of her co-workers about still living at home. Is it really that weird?>> After school I lived at home to pay for various expenses, (it literally is starving student) and to save for down payments etc. In some cultures it's not uncommon for adults to live at home until they marry. (Wasn't gonna wait for that one) <<she really doesn't know anyone locally that she would want to share an apartment with.>> You never know you may end up with a roommate that loves putting hot sauce on everything (my 3 best roommates), or end up with someone who lights up a few joints in the apt, breaks things, and while uh "recouperating" make advances towards say your toilet. And those were his redeeming qualities. As well many roomies don't have the same definition of clean (ie some mould is ok), some roomies also don't care since they aren't the primary lease holder... U of T grads own, UWO grads just don't know how to cut it in the real world heh Don't you love interschool rivalry? And in todays world sometimes living alone besides being loney is economically unfeasible. Just wait until she does her thesis, the nights of sleep you may miss... Not that I know or anything. I was on a first name basis with several librarians, "I got used to writing things such as 56% of participants in the COPD research group were female, 56% had..." Staples loved my paper buying habits. I think I had a couple of bookcases give out. It was an interesting period of time. Then during internships you feel like you know nothing and you're just trying to keep your head over the seemingly rising level of #2... Good times
Originally Posted By avromark Oh and you get to learn hex, and binary and and. If you switch majors you'll end up finding ROM, ACL, etc mean two totally different things
Originally Posted By RoadTrip ^^^ One of the schools my daughter is considering is the University of British Columbia at Vancouver. They offer a highly respected Masters in Library and Information Studies program. She also found out that they consider Americans to be "foreign students" and offer very attractive financial assistance packages.
Originally Posted By avromark Of course those who reside in the U S of A have very "foreign" ideas, and look weird too
Originally Posted By RoadTrip <<Of course those who reside in the U S of A have very "foreign" ideas, and look weird too >> But don't you know; we in Minnesota are not that much different from you Canadians, eh? Okey dokey then. Thanks a bunch.
Originally Posted By TALL Disney Guy ^^^You are if they live in St. Olaf! ;-) I think that's great, Trippy. I can see why it would seem weird to some people if they don't know the details ("You're 2_ and you *still* live at home??"), but her reasons for stayin' with y'all make good sense. Y'all sound so happy and peaceful...may I stay in your son's old room? A basement? A garage? A tent in the backyard?
Originally Posted By avromark All I can say is how about them Northstars (The Caddy engine, not the Dallas team former name) I don't think TDG would enjoy your weather though. So I guess he won't be your quasi-son. There are subtle differences, like umm, we produce less NFL fans.
Originally Posted By mele If your daughter picks that school, RT, you will be expected to make a Seattle/Portland meet! ;-)
Originally Posted By RoadTrip <<Y'all sound so happy and peaceful...may I stay in your son's old room? A basement? A garage? A tent in the backyard?>> I'm not sure TDG... we have some pretty stringent requirements. Do you think you could meet them?? 1) Gotta be employed full time. 2) No use of illegal drugs. 3) Don't drink more alcohol than we do. 4) Never keep us awake at night. 5) You have to participate in our family dinners. 6) Our driveway has enough cars already; you'll have to park in the street. 7) This is kind of personal, but you really do have to wear boxer briefs. Regular briefs are just too 80’s. 8) Provide us with some amusement. If we're gonna house you, you have to make us laugh! 9) Our daughter? Off limits. She’s spoken for. Don’t even THINK about her. 10) Those sounds from our bedroom next door? You really didn't hear them. ;-) So… still interested?
Originally Posted By TALL Disney Guy <1) Gotta be employed full time.> Check. Maybe I could transfer one of my jobs up there? <2) No use of illegal drugs.> Check. Never tried one. <3) Don't drink more alcohol than we do.> Check. I don't drink. More for the Trippys! <4) Never keep us awake at night.> Yes, Sir. I will keep any television watching to a very minimum on volume. <5) You have to participate in our family dinners.> I "must" partake of free food and beverages? *CHECK!* ;-) <6) Our driveway has enough cars already; you'll have to park in the street.> Check. <7) This is kind of personal, but you really do have to wear boxer briefs. Regular briefs are just too 80’s.> *gulp* Well I do have one pair, and wouldn't mind if I had more...I can do it. No problem (if it were just "boxers" this may been an issue). <8) Provide us with some amusement. If we're gonna house you, you have to make us laugh!> "Be careful what you wish for!" <9) Our daughter? Off limits. She’s spoken for. Don’t even THINK about her.> Check. Anyway I think I deserve some time and money to splurge on me and no one else, lol. <10) Those sounds from our bedroom next door? You really didn't hear them. ;-)> What "sounds"? 0 <So… still interested?> Now where is that suitcase?...
Originally Posted By smedley Hey trippy, I think it's great that you get on so well, and that both you and your daughter are obviously happy with the arrangement Although it is quite some time since I lived at home, I still visit all the time (parents are 180 miles away) and they visit us too, and we regularly go on vacation together as well, probably once or twice a year, so I can relate to what you're saying, because I know a lot of people think it's odd that we holiday with my parents, but hey, so long as you get on well and have a great time, where's the problem?
Originally Posted By DVC_dad <<<our daughter gets all kinds of garbage from some of her co-workers about still living at home>>> she should tell them to go to hell. *gasp* did I say that?
Originally Posted By davewasbaloo Hmmmm, interesting. I can totally understand why she is living at home and can see how you love it. I am really happy for your family. For me, once I found my independence at college, I felt stiffled at home. Having a 5 year old, 2 year old and 3 month old brothers may have had an impact. But I felt I needed my independence A.S.A.P and therefore had my own appartment within 2 months of graduation. don't get me wrong, I love my family, but I wanted my own life. But if I were in your daughter's situation, I probably would have made a similar decision. Enjoy the ride while it lasts and I'm with DVC Dad here, if they judge her for a natural decision, then who cares. It's her choice. My BIL lived at home until the age of 29. By then, I thought he was getting a little old. But other than working away for two months, he never left the nest. A different situation here.
Originally Posted By amazedncal2 I vote that you are not nuts I know of many "kids" who are doing the exact same thing as your daughter. As long as you are all happy I think you have all made the correct decision. The busy bodies are probably jealous that your daughter has a loving, supportive relationship with her parents AND a boyfriend AND a job AND a goal. By the way we also paid/are paying for our kids undergrad and the rest is up to them. I think it's a great set up for their future
Originally Posted By 4Disnee That is so cool that you get along so well with your daugher. I also get along very well with my parents and would not trade them for the world. Keep up the good work you are awesome parents!
Originally Posted By DVC_dad Trippy! ROFL <<<3) Don't drink more alcohol than we do.>>> Well this one is pretty much meaningless don't you think? ROFL!!! JK
Originally Posted By DVC_dad <<<10) Those sounds from our bedroom next door? You really didn't hear them. ;-) >>> A kindred spirit you are.
