Originally Posted By friendofdd Differences Between Republicans and Democrats... * Republicans say "Merry Christmas!" Democrats say "Happy Holidays!" * Republicans help the poor during the holidays by sending $50 to the Salvation Army. Democrats help the poor by giving $50, one buck at a time, to panhandlers on the street. * Democrats get back at the Republicans on their Christmas list by giving them fruitcakes. Republicans re-wrap them and send them to in-laws. * Democrats let their kids open all the gifts on Christmas Eve. Republicans make their kids wait until Christmas morning. * When toasting the holidays, Republicans ask for eggnog or mulled wine. Democrats ask for a "Bud." * When not in stores, Republicans shop from a catalog. Democrats watch for "incredible TV offers" on late night television. * Democrats do much of their shopping at Target and Wal-Mart. So do Republicans, but they don't admit it. * Republican parents have no problem buying toy guns for their kids. Democrats refuse to do so. That is why their kids pretend to shoot each other with dolls. * Republicans spends hundreds of dollars and hours of work decorating the yard with outdoor lights and Christmas displays. Democrats save their time and money, and drive around at night to look at *other* people's lights. * Democrats' favorite Christmas movie is "Miracle on 34th Street." Republicans' favorite Christmas movie is "It's a Wonderful Life." Right-Wing Republicans' favorite Christmas movie is "Die Hard." * Republicans always take the price tag off expensive gifts before wrapping. Democrats also remove price tags off pricey gifts ... and reposition them to make sure they are seen. * Republicans wear wide red ties and green sports jackets during the festive season. Democrats do too, all year round. * Most Republicans try, at least once, enclosing indulgent, wretchedly maudlin form letters about their families in their Christmas cards. Public ridicule from Democrats usually discourages them from doing it again. * Democrats' favorite Christmas carol is "Deck the Halls." Young Democrats' favorite Christmas carol is "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer." Republicans' favorite Christmas carol is "White Christmas." Young Republicans' favorite Christmas carol is "White Christmas." * Cheapskate Republicans buy an artificial Christmas tree. Tight-fisted Democrats buy a real tree, but they wait until the week before Christmas when the lots lower their prices. * Democrat men like to watch football while the women fix holiday meals. On this, Republicans are in full agreement. * Republicans see nothing wrong with letting their children play "Cowboys and Indians." Democrats don't either, as long as the Indians win. * Republicans first began thinking like Republicans when they stopped believing in Santa Claus. Democrats became Democrats because they never stopped believing in Santa Claus.
Originally Posted By gottaluvdavillains <<Democrats get back at the Republicans on their Christmas list by giving them fruitcakes. Republicans re-wrap them and send them to in-laws.>> This is the best one!! I still believe in Santa Claus!
Originally Posted By DyGDisney I still believe in Santa Claus too! He doesn't come if you don't believe. My mom's a republican, maybe that's why her stocking was empty last Christmas morning!!
Originally Posted By DyGDisney "* Republican parents have no problem buying toy guns for their kids. Democrats refuse to do so. That is why their kids pretend to shoot each other with dolls." This is true, but funny.
Originally Posted By SuperDry That's quite a list, friendofdd. Although it seems that each and every item just happens to be worded so that it's at the Democrats expense. It's not quite what I'd expect from someone that self-identifies as an "independent."
Originally Posted By friendofdd Interesting observation, Superdry. I found it in a rather innocuous site in a google search for Christmas humor. I've just reread it and to me it provokes some gentle laughter at both parties in a rather harmless fashion. But if I belonged to one of those parties, perhaps I would feel it was harsher humor against one over the other. Please accept my apology. I mean't no offense to either group. BTW, I am willing to laugh at myself as an independent, but I don't seem to find much stuff about that group(s).
Originally Posted By SuperDry <<< Please accept my apology. I mean't no offense to either group. >>> No apology needed! <<< I've just reread it and to me it provokes some gentle laughter at both parties in a rather harmless fashion. >>> It's absolutely harmless. But if you think that it's not skewed in one direction, well, maybe you're not as independent as you think. Or so it seems to me. And I know that you know I'm posting this in the same spirit that you did.
Originally Posted By friendofdd I speak of being an independent as a simple fact. I registered with a party in 1960 and in 1964 disaffiliated and have not belonged to a party since. My reason was that I had voted for people in both parties. That doesn't mean that I do not share values with parties. I have stated several times on these boards that my politics are conservative both socially and fiscally. I'll try to indicate where I fit with these "hunorous" things here. * Republicans say "Merry Christmas!" Democrats say "Happy Holidays!" -I say Merry Christmas * Republicans help the poor during the holidays by sending $50 to the Salvation Army. Democrats help the poor by giving $50, one buck at a time, to panhandlers on the street. -I give more money to organizations, but also people on the street. * Democrats get back at the Republicans on their Christmas list by giving them fruitcakes. Republicans re-wrap them and send them to in-laws. -I have never given anybody a fruitcake under any circumstance. * Democrats let their kids open all the gifts on Christmas Eve. Republicans make their kids wait until Christmas morning. - Our family has always opened them Christmas eve except those from Santa. * When toasting the holidays, Republicans ask for eggnog or mulled wine. Democrats ask for a "Bud." -True tee-totaler, no toasting. * When not in stores, Republicans shop from a catalog. Democrats watch for "incredible TV offers" on late night television. -Shop only in stores. * Democrats do much of their shopping at Target and Wal-Mart. So do Republicans, but they don't admit it. -If it is not in the mall, I rarely shop there. * Republican parents have no problem buying toy guns for their kids. Democrats refuse to do so. That is why their kids pretend to shoot each other with dolls. - Bought toy guns for my boy, dolls for my girls. * Republicans spends hundreds of dollars and hours of work decorating the yard with outdoor lights and Christmas displays. Democrats save their time and money, and drive around at night to look at *other* people's lights. I spend 1-2 hours putting up outside lights which cost me less than $50 and drive around at night to look at others lights. * Democrats' favorite Christmas movie is "Miracle on 34th Street." Republicans' favorite Christmas movie is "It's a Wonderful Life." Right-Wing Republicans' favorite Christmas movie is "Die Hard." - Favorite movie - White Christmas. Own a copy. * Republicans always take the price tag off expensive gifts before wrapping. Democrats also remove price tags off pricey gifts ... and reposition them to make sure they are seen. - Remove tags from gift though none would be considered expensive. * Republicans wear wide red ties and green sports jackets during the festive season. Democrats do too, all year round. -Since retirement no ties. Have no green in my wardrobe. * Most Republicans try, at least once, enclosing indulgent, wretchedly maudlin form letters about their families in their Christmas cards. Public ridicule from Democrats usually discourages them from doing it again. -Mostly send a letter about our family, but just cards this year. * Democrats' favorite Christmas carol is "Deck the Halls." Young Democrats' favorite Christmas carol is "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer." Republicans' favorite Christmas carol is "White Christmas." Young Republicans' favorite Christmas carol is "White Christmas." -Favorite carol is Joy to the world, but have a fondness for Grandma got run over..... * Cheapskate Republicans buy an artificial Christmas tree. Tight-fisted Democrats buy a real tree, but they wait until the week before Christmas when the lots lower their prices. - artificial tree * Democrat men like to watch football while the women fix holiday meals. On this, Republicans are in full agreement. - seldom watch sports on TV * Republicans see nothing wrong with letting their children play "Cowboys and Indians." Democrats don't either, as long as the Indians win. - Because of my Iroquois blood, I like to see the indians win, but don't insist upon it. * Republicans first began thinking like Republicans when they stopped believing in Santa Claus. Democrats became Democrats because they never stopped believing in Santa Claus. - Believe in Santa when with my grand-children, otherwise not.
Originally Posted By beamerdog Very funny list. Although I have to say that my favorite song of the season is Adam Sandler's The Hannukah Song.
Originally Posted By iamsally Rod and I both heartily believe in Santa. 'Nuff said. Thanks for a political Holiday chuckle fodd.
Originally Posted By avromark Now not to get too off topic but I'm all for mixed Christian/Jewish families it just brings so much more holidays to celebrate As an "outsider" I see humour at both sides with this. I used to think I'm neutral but lately I've been siding with one party here. (I think most here can guess which), however keep in mind my entire politcal spectrum is left of yours. So I guess I'm a moderate or whatever
