Originally Posted By friendofdd Not many people are aware of it, but Franz Liszt actually had a younger brother named Gary. He was quite the rebel and, unlike his older brother, who was an undisputed virtuoso of the piano, Gary Liszt chose to express himself in a style of music that approximates today's hip-hop. Unfortunately, the mainstream culture of the day had no appreciation for the genre, so while still a teenager, Gary moved from their hometown of Doborj‡n to a nearby village that was more accepting of him and his talents à a city that was, in fact, founded upon rap music. Gary knew that he had arrived. Sadly, just a few months later, Franz received a telegram from the authorities of this town, and the news was not good. Apparently Gary had gotten too wrapped up in his life as a hip- hop artist, becoming a full-fledged gangsta and, ultimately, killing a cop. The telegram reported this news along with the horrifying bottom line, that Gary had been summarily executed in the manner customary for the locale. As Franz read the news of his brother's death, his eyes filled with tears. Just then his assistant happened by and, noticing his despair, inquired, "What troubles thee, My Lord?" To which Franz replied,... "They hung Gary in Rap City, No. 2."
Originally Posted By christiemarsh88 That...is...terrible. But I love it. Here's one: Once upon a time, there was a small village. The friars in this village had fallen behind in their mortgage payment on the abbey. So, in a desperate attempt to raise the money, they opened a florist shop. Everyone in the village was eager to help the men of God, and began buying their flowers from the monks. Unfortunately, the rival florist across town saw his business suddenly decline. He desperately tried everything to get the monks to shut down. First, he simply asked nicely. But the monks couldn't give up so easily; they needed the money, too. Then, the florist sent his mother to ask nicely. The monks still refused. Finally, the florist began to send threatening letters. These too had no effect. In desperation, the florist hired Hugh McTeagle, the roughest, meanest, and dirtiest thug in the village. Hugh went to "persuade" the friars to give up their life of flora. He trashed their shop, severely beat each of the monks, and said that he would be back if they didn't shut down immediately. Of course, what could these poor men of God do? They quickly and quietly shut down their shop. There's a great lesson in this story, my children. A lesson that each of us can benefit from, and would do well to remember: Only Hugh Can Prevent Florist Friars.
Originally Posted By Jim in Merced CA Roy Rogers, a lifelong cowboy boot wearer, was experiencing foot pain, and had just purchased a great looking pair of expensive leather loafers. One afternoon, while napping in his backyard, a neighborhood cat found the new shoes, started chewing them, and eventually consumed them bit by bit. Awakening with a start, Roy noticed the shoes were missing. He sat up, and noticed the cat licking his chops. At that moment, his assistant came out from the house and asked... 'Pardon me, Roy. Is that the cat who ate your new shoes?'
Originally Posted By christiemarsh88 Okay, I know Chatanooga Choo-Choo, but I still had to look up the Roy Rogers one...for some reason, it just didn't make sense to me. Brain fart!
