Originally Posted By Darkbeer Catholic Dictionary - For Catholics Only (and anyone else who can understand it) AMEN -- The only part of a prayer that everyone knows. BULLETIN -- Your receipt for attending Mass.. CHOIR-- A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Parish to lip-sync. HOLY WATER A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY. HYMN A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation's range. RECESSIONAL The last song at Mass often sung a little more quietly, since most of the people HYMN have already left. JESUITS An order of priests known for their ability to find colleges with good basketball teams. JONAH The original 'Jaws' story JUSTICE When kids have kids of their own. KYRIE ELEISON The only Greek words that most Catholics can recognize besides gyros and baklava.(For you non-Catholics it means "Lord have mercy".) MAGI The most famous trio to attend a baby shower. MANGER Where Mary placed Jesus because Joseph forgot the crib when packing the donkey. PEW A medieval torture device still found in Catholic churches PROCESSION The ceremonial formation at the beginning of Mass consisting of altar servers, the celebrant, and late parishioners looking for seats. RECESSIONAL The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of Mass led by parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the parking lot. RELICS People who have been going to Mass for so long, they actually know when to sit, kneel, and stand. STABLE Where Mary gave birth to Jesus because Joseph wasn't covered by an HMO. (The Bible's way of showing us that holiday travel has always been rough.) TEN COMMANDMENTS The most important Top Ten list not given by David Letterman USHERS The only people in the parish who don't know the seating capacity of a pew MERRY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE, even if you are NOT Catholic
Originally Posted By Autopia Deb Not Catholic, but a lot of that applies to Baptists too. Very funny! Merry Christmas to you and D-Mom
Originally Posted By amazedncal2 << also not Catholic nor CM Paley but thought it was very cute I got a big smile from the meaning of Manger Merry Christmas Darkbeer and the soon to be Mrs
Originally Posted By Schmitty Good Vibes << also non catholic, but every one of those rang true for me. Very delightful. Thanks DB!
Originally Posted By Disneydanny i'm also Catholic and found that amusing as well. almost as amusing as the following which one of the preists in residence at my chuirch read at the begining of his Christmas Day Homily: <a href="http://www.voicings.com/preachershome.htm" target="_blank">http://www.voicings.com/preach...home.htm</a>
