An open apology to my darling Goofyernmost

Discussion in 'Play Pen' started by See Post, Aug 8, 2011.

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    Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter

    We have far bigger problems than flowers at this point, Dug. Say, do you, perchance, also have a moonlight business as a hit man or voodoo practitioner? No particular reason for asking, just curious. In a purely hypothetical kind of way.
     
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    Originally Posted By murfsmom

    OH, we have neighbors at the end of our street that make voodoo doll and stick pins in them and when ever they get mad at something they will randomly throw one in your yard !! We've had a few,I tear it all apart and leave it on the wall because they always walk past our house. .........what ? I don't litter, it's all put in a little sealed baggie so they can recycle !!!!!
     
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    Originally Posted By DlandDug

    Hit man? Voodoo?

    As I have said again and again, I do NOT actually work for the Walt Disney Company!
     
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    Originally Posted By Goofyernmost

    If Pixie did that and didn't put it in a baggy, would that be considered Glitter litter?
     
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    Originally Posted By Lisann22

    <<<moonlight business as a hit man or voodoo practitioner>>>

    Ha! Ha! Ha!

    Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda!

    That's right the very person you kicked to the curb HAD all those services at her fingertips.
     
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    Originally Posted By Goofyernmost

    Really? Oops! I picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue.
     
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    Originally Posted By Goofyernmost

    Umm...Lisann...I was just a jokin about the Sandra Bullock thing. My standards are quite high though. You got to have at least 1/3rd of your teeth, preferably in the front. (Takes better pictures) Other than that I don't have many requirements.
     
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    Originally Posted By murfsmom

    Well tarnation, is there going to be a weddin or not ?We just got home and sure enuf there a voodoo doll in our front yard, Don't know why,maybe cause we didn't trim the roses the right way, they didn't like the color of the new one, our cat runs when she sees them, who knows !!! But if you need a voodoo doll to get this thing goin I'll be happy to send you one I'd go down the street and ask for one just for you but I tend to stay away from that neck of the woods !!
     
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    Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter

    I don't know if there is going to be a wedding. Granted I might just be over sensitive, but there's a small part of me that thinks maybe the fact that my intended A) hasn't actually proposed, B) is actively trolling for other women right in front of my face, and (most importantly) C) has not presented me with a ring from Tiffany might not be good signs.

    But that's probably just the usual pre-wedding jitters.
     
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    Originally Posted By Goofyernmost

    Excuse me Ms. Glitter, but I believe I addressed both of those topics back in 78. I have started to get a little antsy because no response has been forth coming. I was just exploring my options is all. It's not that I wanted to take that route, but I'm not getting any younger and waiting might be fatal.

    With the proper response, that glimmering gem, of your choice, would now be adorning that darling digit as we speak. Why is it that you women folk always seem to turn things around and blame the man for everything?

    Patiently waiting for your reply...I remain, completely committed, your little Goofy er n most.

    Note to self...I really should shorten my name a little!
     
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    Originally Posted By DlandDug

    All righty then.

    The first truckload of junk-- I mean splendiferous fixin's-- has been dispatched from Stats. (You should have seen how I haggled for all these bent willow butterflies!)

    Under normal circumstances, the BRIDE TO BE pays the bills, but... these being somewhat... um... abnormal circumstances... um...

    WHO PICKS UP THIS BILL???
     
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    Originally Posted By Goofyernmost

    Ah...Thanks for the wedding gift, Dug! Very much appreciated. My money is all tied up in rings and things.
     
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    Originally Posted By DlandDug

    >>Ah...Thanks for the wedding gift...<<

    No, no, no. My wedding gift is currently hung out in the garage to dry out. These are bona fide supplies. You know, tulle and fancy crystal finger bowls and doilies and latex gloves. That kind of stuff.
     
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    Originally Posted By 999HAUNTS

    Tulle *and* latex gloves??? Boy howdy! This is turnin' inta one fancy shindig!
     
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    Originally Posted By mickeymeg

    When is the date of this big doo ? I hope I haven't missed it. I need to find just the right outfit to wear for such an occasion. I should start looking, but I don't know if I should be looking in the ++++++ size section if it is soon or if I have time to fix this situation a little ?
     
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    Originally Posted By Lisann22

    mickeymeg I think that might be what the latex gloves are for.
     
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    Originally Posted By mickeymeg

    uhoh !
     
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    Originally Posted By murfsmom

    Speaking of latex gloves ,Congratulations to you Mickeymeg on the birth of your baby girl this morning !!
    At least SOMEONE is celebrating something around here, are the bride and groom in negotiations what ????
     
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    Originally Posted By Goofyernmost

    This is Irlene, Goof’s sister, well half sister actually but that’s another story, here to let everyone know that we have had some strange goings on around here lately. The excitement seems to have died down about the upcoming weddin between Goof and what’s her name and all 16 of us kids thought up the idea that letten you all know about it was a good idea.

    A few days ago, while Goof was brewin up some special stuff for the re-ception, we all heard a loud boom and ran out to the woods to see what had happened. I seems that the still just blew up. Goof was struck on the head by a 55 gallon barrel and we was all worried sick onaccounta because it was the only 55 gallon barrel we got. Rest assured it was alright, just badly dented and a little of the rust was cleaned off. Whew, close call there. Anyway, Goof was just a sittin on the ground mumbling something about seeing pixie litter circling around his head, or something like that. It was hard to tell exactly what he was saying due to the drool. He got up an ran towards the house where he grabbed the $450.00 he had borrowed from Uncle Clem. He then started a flirtin with a couple of ladies on the comp puter all the while muttering “How do ya like me know” over and over again. He was actin quite peculiar.

    Before we could stop him, he jumped in the pickup and headed toward town. Nothin any good ever comes from bein in town. We all thought he would be right back, but when he hadn’t returned in three days we started to get worried that maybe the truck had be stolen or something, it’s the only one we got. The next day we asked our neighbor Lester to drive a couple of us to town to see ifen we could locate the truck and if we had the time, try and find Goof.

    We found the truck alright, parked right there, big as life, in front of the local house of ill repute. We was righteously disgusted that the place was still there. We still don’t know how someone can sell something that everyone else is giving away. We decided to take a few minutes and see if we could find him inside and find him we did…curled up in a ball in the corner. He had spent all his money and hisself for that matter, and was still sayin, louder then before, HOW DO YA LIKE ME NOW!

    We called the shrink over in the next county, and they sent some nice burly fellows over to pick him up and take him to an institution located in the county seat. Last we heard, he was restin nicely and his room was done over with some nice foam wall coverings and a bunch of bars on the windows so no one can git in and steal from him. Because of all of this, we all thought that it might be a good idea for everyone to put a hold on the weddin plans at least until his left eye stops twitchin so much.

    Special thanks to Ma, for shoutin through the closet door about how to operate this new fangled electronic comp-puter. We really should let her out!
     
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    Originally Posted By DlandDug

    So, the bill goes to the county home? Is that right?
     

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