Originally Posted By friendofdd Dear L and L, It is obvious somebody has hacked into your LP registered screen names and is using them to reply to questions in this topic. Should I report this matter to admin? Can I trust you to be you when you answer me? Expectently perplexed
Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter Dear Expectently perplexed, Fear not, dear. I have since discovered that Lisann slipped some illegal substance into my tea; thus, my uncharacteristic post. So, no, no need to report it to admin. And Miss Litter will be here to answer any of your questions with her characteristic brilliant, thoughtful, and insightful replies. And Lisa will no doubt be along any minute now to insult and berate you. All is well in the L & L world! Good luck, dear!
Originally Posted By ajnhollysmommy Dearest Lisa and Litter, I have been sharing with other LPers about my problems here at home. Maybe you guys could help me. I have a massive growth on my hip. It began growing off my hip 11 months ago. It now weighs in at 17lbs. I did not have too much of a problem with the growth until this last month. Now it has started to scream and cry at me all hours of a day and wont stop! The worst part about it - it is producing teeth. Please help me, what can I do to make the crying stop? I thought with me becoming a Bash Facilitator that I could some how separate myself from the growth and ship it off. And just say it was from there Bash Pal. So I took it to the post office,I just picked a person off the list, Had it all ready to go, and they wanted $100 in postage. AHH so here I am, with this growth attached still. Please I beg you, HELP! I have been told that once this growth pops out white shinny sharp things that it will be easier to deal with. Is this true? Sad Soul in Spokane
Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter Dear Sad Soul in Spokane, It is, indeed, true that the growth will be easier to deal with once it pops out its shiny, white objects. For about. . . oh, maybe a month if you're lucky. Then it will go through the whole process again. And again. And again. And after that, it will develop the ability to say "No," constantly and at sometimes ear-splitting volume and pitch. This will be followed in rapid succession by other new and challenging behaviors, including but not limited to, extreme messiness, aversion to all but four approved foods (all of them unhealthy), loud disapproval of clothing you choose for it, and finally a propensity for being attracted to boys who make your hair stand on end. On the bright side, however, it will be big amounts of fun taking your growth to Disneyland. Good luck, dear!
Originally Posted By chickendumpling Dear Lisa and Litter: I have a rare opportunity to take what is known as a "dal-ma-tian" in this fun little game I play with some friends of mine. The problem is that one of my friends is not a fan of the spotted dog and I don't want to upset her by participating in a game that I know might upset her. She is a very kind and sensitive person and has a very fragile demeanor (unless of course someone has spiked her tea or she gets overheated on an amusement park ride but really who can blame her then?). What should I do? In a Dither Over Dalmatians
Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter Dear In a Dither Over Dalmatians, I regret to inform you, dear, that the Ol' Skunk Eye is now firmly fixed in a northwesterly direction. Disapprovingly yours, Miss Litter P.S. And LOL on this: "She is a very kind and sensitive person and has a very fragile demeanor (unless of course someone has spiked her tea or she gets overheated on an amusement park ride but really who can blame her then?)." AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Um, I mean, harumph. How could you?
Originally Posted By Deogges Mom Dear L & L, I donated my hair to Locks of Love this afternoon, which, of course means tht I have a extreme new look. Now my sweetie won't stop staring at me. I understand that it is strange to see someone with short hair that you have only seen with long hair, but it is disconcerting to have some one stare at me constantly. What should I do about this? And am I going to have everyone I know staring at me until they get used to the new look? Pleasehelp I don't know if I can stand be stared at anymore. Short hair in OC.
Originally Posted By MissCandice I love people who cut their hair and donate to Locks of Love. I did that the 2nd time I got sick and was able to donate a large amount of hair. Dear L&L: Hello. Yours greetingly, MissCandice.
Originally Posted By ajnhollysmommy Dearest Litter, Your knowledge on this type of growth is astounding. I have decided that you need another test subject. I went to Money Tree today, then I went to FedEx. They cut the growth off, and sent it your way via overnight delivery. Should be at your doorstep by 7am Monday morning. AND I had a send one growth, send a noise maker free. you now will have 2 new test subjects. No need to thank me. Please feel free to return when growth and noise maker reaches age of self containment. sincerely, Rejoicing in Spokane
Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter Dear Short hair in OC, The quickest solution to your dilemma, dear, is to tell your sweetie some long, convoluted, pathetic tale about a traumatic childhood experience which involved someone staring at you and that after years in therapy, you have discovered that the only balm for this particular psychological pain is jewelry. Preferably wildly expensive jewelry. Start carrying a stop watch around, and if your sweetie stares at you for more than three seconds at a time, whip out the Tiffany catalog. Good luck, dear!
Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter Dear MissCandice, Hello, dear! Thank you for gracing our humble thread with your luminous presence. It's always a joy to have you visit! Adoringly yours, Miss Litter
Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter Dearest Rejoicing in Spokane, Oh, my. Oh, dear. Whilst Miss Litter is enormously flattered at your faith in her abilities, dear, I fear that I simply cannot accept such a. . . um. . . lavish gift. Lisa has very strict policies about such things, or I assure you I would be delighted to accept your delivery. Simply delighted. But sadly, I must decline. All because of Lisa, you know. Regretfully yours, Miss Litter
Originally Posted By goodgirl Dear Lisa and Litter, I had a horrible nightmare last night. I dreamt that I missed my hair appointment. The dream has bothered me all day. How does one survive such a thing? Signed, Never late in Portland
Originally Posted By debtee Dear Lisa and Litter I have this group of friends that keep talking about food. Morning, noon and night. It's to the point where I'm dreaming about this wonderful food all the time! What can I do? Signed Lost in the bush
Originally Posted By quincytoo OMG Please L&L May May *moi* please answer the last two questions?? They were written for *moi* and *moi* alone!!!!! Respectfully yours Jumping at the bit
Originally Posted By quincytoo Dear Never Late in Portland RUN, don't walk to your nearest fine wine store...buy a bottle of Ch.Margaux 2003 or if she likes white then a bottle of Giaconda 2004 Estate Chardonnay would do wonders to make her forget!!!!!!
Originally Posted By quincytoo Dear Lost in the bush Sorry about the delayed response I had to eat the fruit stuffed pork loin roast with the cherry demi-glace (minor disagreement, we are fine now), and the tender crisp sauted vegetables along side the garlic mashed potatoes, that my husband cooked for our dinner. Too bad he took so long to cook it as I drunk alot of the Tinhorn Creek Chardonnay 2002 that he had planned to serve with the dinner. BURP...OOPS.... I mean, in answer to your question I would advise you to fly to Paris and took part in the Cordon Blu' culinary school!!!!!
