Originally Posted By 999HAUNTS I think a small donation to the family trust in leu of flowers / plants is a wonderful idea, especially if you don't know their financial state. And, I would definately contact the wife somehow and let her know of your association with him.
Originally Posted By amazedncal2 I echo what everyone has said about writing a personal note. If you can't think of what to say, you can even write the note a week or two from now, sometimes those can be the most meaningful when the cards have stopped coming. I also suggest the donation over flowers. I'm sorry you lost your friend.
Originally Posted By MomofPrincess I'm so sorry to hear this. My thoughts are with you. I'm sure his wife would really appreciate a handwritten note regarding how much you thought of him...
Originally Posted By LPFan22 My thoughts and prayers are with you and the family of your friend. Sorry to hear this sad news.
Originally Posted By Ursula Thank you, everyone. Your thoughts are sincerely appreciated. Today, I had to tell a lot of people at work. I find that I dislike having tell people bad news, but I think I'm getting better at it, if that's possible. Well, maybe more comfortable and knowing to pause after I say what I have to say. We have breakfast at work each day. Today, I sat with friends and we talked about our friend. Who was the last to speak with him, why, what, etc. He was a good guy, you can tell by how many friends a guy leaves behind. I think breakfast was just over an hour today and it's usually two minutes. We also found out that he had made prior arrangements, and that his wife knew what he would like done. So, no arrangements, but a beach party.
Originally Posted By Disneymom443 A beach party... Sounds like this guy wanted to remember him in a fun way, not a sad one with everyone crying. I am sorry for your loss of a good friend. He sounded like a guy that loved life and should be remembered that way. Which can be hard at times.
Originally Posted By Ursula Why is it that when things like this happens, I immediately think about what it must be like for him right now? Is he safe, happy, aware, does it feel groggy like in a sleep? Euphoria? Is that really odd to think like this?
Originally Posted By Disneymom443 I think that is a normal way to think, so I don't think it is odd at all.
Originally Posted By Ursula Wow, the president of our company just sent out a really nice email to everyone about the sad news. This is the first time I've ever known for them to do something for a past employee. I guess that says a lot about our friend.
Originally Posted By Stacers76 Ursula, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your friend's family. I too echo the advice of everyone else, that a note to his family about how you knew him and enjoyed his personality is a good idea. It sounds like your co-workers feel the same and it might be nice to get them in on a letter/note/flowers etc also. And no, you're not odd for wondering how he is. This past January, I lost a friend and co-worker, in a motorcycle accident. He was a young father, funny, genuine nice guy...and for the first several weeks that was always on my mind, as I was able to grieve and time went by, I felt comforted more and more every day and I don't know how, but you just will know that he's good where he's at now. Please take care!
Originally Posted By TALL Disney Guy I know this just sounds repetitive, but I'm so sorry to hear of this too...
Originally Posted By goodgirl I understand your pain Ursula. We somehow find it more accepting when much older people pass on or when someone dies of a grave illness. But a sudden accident is so unsettling. Although it was 9 years ago, someone I was very close to died unexpectantly and I still greive for him.
Originally Posted By smedley Sending you hugs Ursula, it's always ahocking when something like this happens. I hope you do write a letter to his wife and family, and are able to attend the beach party to say your goodbyes *hugs*
Originally Posted By Ursula Thank you everyone. I love that the posters of LP can support each other most when we need it. I got a work call from a friend today and he asked if I knew about our friend-in-common. We ended up speaking for a while and then my friend said something so inappropriate, it made me giggle. He said,"Of all of the people in sales, why THIS guy? There are so many others that were not as nice!" I mean, he meant it in a nice way, but it came out all wrong so we had a good laugh about how awkward the situation makes all of us feel.
Originally Posted By TALL Disney Guy Ursula, it *is* important to find humor in times of pain. I have not had a great loss yet, but I have heard from others that the strangest or simplest things can send them into a fit of giggles, and the body and mind really need that release in times like these. I'm glad you talked with that friend of yours and that you two found some laughter today.
Originally Posted By Mary Poppins What tragic news for you, Ursula. I'm sorry to hear this. Please accept my condolences.
