Originally Posted By barboy "Why should a child that makes a mistake, such has having a sex and getting pregnant, have to be handicapped for the rest of their lives" What does this have to do with parental notification. Abortion rights are one thing and notification is another. I knew a girl who got pregnant and it became a family decision to terminate the pregnancy---I can only guess by how the this girl(now a woman)is doing that they made the proper choice as a family. I also knew a teenager who got pregnant and just had to tell her very conservative parents (Kansas wheat farmers)---talk about scary!!---- guess what happened??????? she, after a lot of tears and fears and many talks/yellings/consolings with Mom and Dad, decided to carry the baby to full term. (I am now on this planet because of her decision to have me.)
Originally Posted By PlainoLJoe <<Like it or not, abortion is a major medical procedure that can affect the lives of women of legal age, let alone children.>> More so than having a child that will prevent the child from ever getting ahead in life? I think not.
Originally Posted By PlainoLJoe <<What does this have to do with parental notification. Abortion rights are one thing and notification is another. I knew a girl who got pregnant and it became a family decision to terminate the pregnancy---I can only guess by how the this girl(now a woman)is doing that they made the proper choice as a family.>> No matter what the parents say or do, it will be the pregnant girl that will have to deal with everything alone. Forcing a child to tell their parents something that they are afraid to tell them makes the situation worse. Its bad enough that the girl thinks she cant go to her parents for something like this (100% a parental failure for causing fear in their child), now we are forcing them into the lions den? yeah that makes sense.
Originally Posted By barboy "No matter what the parents say or do, it will be the pregnant girl that will have to deal with everything alone." Why do you say this? You need to stop treating this with an "allness" approach. Some girls after parental notification will be beaten, others will be lovingly embraced, and still others will be entirely on their own regadless. There are a thousand scenarios of what will or could happen to a girl upon pregnancy, notification and abortion or no abortion. "More so than having a child that will prevent the child from ever getting ahead in life? I think not." Once again that is so one sided---just to let you know my neighbor got pregnant and she(17) and her mom live together and her mom raises the child while this girl now 20 is working full time. This girl and her mom absolutely love and adore their little boy and they feel very blessed that he is in their lives. This child I predict will have a very strong base to start his life. And by the way this is an "upper" neighborhood and not the inner city where one would expect all the disadvantages to fall on the child.
Originally Posted By Dirk_D_from_Oregon Barboy is correct. Not every scenario is grim. All I am asking for is to not be left out of the loop in a decision of this magnitude in my childs life.
Originally Posted By fkurucz >>Children make mistakes. Most of them dont have to pay for them the rest of their lives. Why should a child that makes a mistake, such has having a sex and getting pregnant, have to be handicapped for the rest of their lives. This is a growing pain and abortion is a solution.<< Perhaps, but does a child really have the maturity to make this kind of decision? As I said before, a child cannot request a tylenol at school. The intent of these laws seems to be to "protect" a child from her parents, which strikes me as bizarre.
Originally Posted By PlainoLJoe vs the law that is going to take any ability for the child to grow up to be an adult. I guess its good if the kid stays at home for the rest of their life and isnt allowed to make any decisions.
Originally Posted By fkurucz "vs the law that is going to take any ability for the child to grow up to be an adult." Baloney. There are many things that minors should not be allowed to to do. Besides, they'll have their entire adult lives to be able to make these decisions. I do not understand why some people seem hell bent at turning kids into adults before they are ready. One aspect of this that really chaps my hide are those who constantly lobby to have the aga of consent lowered below 18. Why? Are we doing this to make life easier for predatory creeps?
Originally Posted By PlainoLJoe Why are parents so hell bent on not letting their kids grow up at all? Some people just need to learn to let go.
Originally Posted By barboy Why are parents so hell bent on not letting their kids grow up at all? Some people just need to learn to let go. I agree fully----but not with a deep, profound and life changing decision such as life or death---that is the ultimate ramification---life or death via no abortion or abortion. Parents should be informed.
Originally Posted By woody My feeling is all sexually active kids should be treated as emancipated adults. Or an second option is they have a CHOICE to be emanicipated or seek parental notification. Unless the issue is truly about sexual abuse, in which the offending adult/parent should be prosecuted and parental rights terminated, I think parents should have RIGHTS on this issue.
Originally Posted By Dirk_D_from_Oregon Seems the general consensus here, with some exceptions, is that most LPers want child notification laws. I find this uplifting and very interesting.
Originally Posted By schoolsinger I think abortion should not be allowed without consent. I am not talking about the consent of the parents. I am not talking about the consent of the pregnant girl either. We need to consider the one who is affected the most from an abortion. I suggest that abortion not be allowed without the consent of the human who would be killed by the abortion.
Originally Posted By schoolsinger I know that fetuses can’t speak. But, I bet if they could speak, understand what abortion is, and be able to make a choice, the vast majority would choose not to be killed.
Originally Posted By tiggertoo <<More so than having a child that will prevent the child from ever getting ahead in life? I think not.>> You seem to think that an abortion is the only way to solve the teenage parenting issue, and in that you are sadly mistaken. Adoption just as viable an option as abortion concerning the situation you allude to. <<Its bad enough that the girl thinks she cant go to her parents for something like this (100% a parental failure for causing fear in their child), now we are forcing them into the lions den? yeah that makes sense.>> There are hundreds of things that children fear to tell their parents and hundreds of parent who abuse their children for other issues they disapprove of, for instance drugs, grades, etc… The answer is NOT preventing parents from knowing, otherwise, I can make the same argument for every other potential such situation in which the child fears the parents. How would you feel if the school district could legally prevent you of knowing that your son or daughter was caught selling drugs because they thought you would become upset? Or is undergoing drug treatment because the child fears the parent may get upset? I don’t by this argument for an instant.
Originally Posted By HyperTyper The problem here is much bigger than I think either social liberals or conservatives realize. We make the assumption that as soon as children are old enough to cross the street by themselves, they are practically adults and can take care of themselves. It's a false and irresponsible notion. Until children ARE of age, they need to be much closely supervised than they are, even as older teens. There was a time when it was socially inappropriate for underage boys and girls to be alone together. That's what chaperones were for. It's an idea that had sound reasons and has been done-away with entirely, and not just by 'liberals.' Say the word 'chaperone' to today's youth, and you will be met with blank stares. When are we going to realize that maturity does not magically arrive with puberty? ADULT workers are supervised in the workplace. We have police, security, and bouncers and bars to keep "grown-up" behavior in line. Why is it that we think we can leave teenagers unsupervised for hours or even days at a time, and not have extremely serious consequences result? A while back I was involved in the Scout program, and I was shocked at the level of parental UNINVOLVEMENT in the lives of those boys ... who came from conservative Christian families!!! They would trapse around the neighborhood for hours, up to who-knows-what. Their parents would have no clue where they were or what they were up to. They wouldn't care, either, for the boys would only get scolded if they got into trouble or if their parents needed them for something. They would watch movies WAY beyond their years. (Their parents often hadn't a clue.) They played violent and sexual video games. They made crank phone calls, and did pranks in grocery stores. And the parents simply weren't there. These aren't a few slacker parents ... this is the NORM. The media is no help. Parents who actually continue RAISING their teenagers are portrayed as obsessive, clingy and smothering. Popular culture says childeren need their own "space" and "privacy," and that parents have no right dictating to children what they should wear, what they can do after school, what they can watch on TV, or what they do online. How absurd! Teenagehood is NOT adulthood! Adult responsibilities and freedoms should be assumed gradually and deservingly, with the clear demonstration of maturity and responsibility. They should not bestowed upon kids on their sixteenth birthday along with the keys to a new car they didn't earn!!!! Parents throughout society need to reassert their parental authority and reintroduce structure and discipline into the lives of teens. Society and the state need to support them in this. Kids will whine and fight it. Too bad for them. Pregnancy, substance abuse and time in juvie are much harder than any rules a parent could lay down. Kids need to stay busy with school, sports, music, jobs, hobbies and family. There should be no time or opportunity for having sex, smoking, getting drunk, doing drugs, committing crimes or 'hooking-up' with strangers on the Internet. Sure, dating and girls (or boys) should be part of the teenage experience, but it should be in the context of group socializing, not pairing-off and making-out at age 14!!!! Kids also need to be given practical tools and methods for avoiding trouble. It isn't enough just to tell them to abstain. They need to know the mechanics of abstinance: Avoiding single-dating until one is much older, not dating boys who aren't gentlemen and girls who aren't ladies, dating people with the same values and expectations, not dressing provocatively, not wasting time with sexualized media and especially pornography, staying well-away from dances and parties where alcohol and sex are on the menu. Better parenting won't save all kids. There are some who will rebel and do as they please, whatever the rules. But I daresay most kids are practically BEGGING for more guidance and structure in their lives, and are simply being denied it because the grown-ups in their lives just can't be bothered. Should abortion without parental consent be illegal? Absoultely. But much more is needed. It's time to wise-up and treat teens not like babies, and not like adults, but like teens. We've got to quit being afraid of our children, or trying to be "popular" with them. Parents have got to get serious about parenting. We love our children best not by letting them do as they please, but by charting a course for success and happiness with them ... a course that involves guidelines, goals, parental discipline and self-discipline. It sounds all very square and backwards, some will say. Remember, it was the NORM among generations still living. What has changed? Have we become more cool? More hip? More tolerant? More sophisticated? More practical and realistic? Absolutely not. We have become distracted and lazy ... abysmally lazy.
