Originally Posted By mawnck Not to be a negative Nellie (oh who am I kidding ... I'm ALWAYS a negative Nellie) but Memphis is one of the places I called home for several years, and I wasn't just real crazy about it. Now all of this was 12+ years ago, so keep that in mind, but here are my impressions: It is a good sized city, with the good-sized-city stuff you'd expect (including a rinky-dink little amusement park with the most awesome 1917-vintage wooden roller coaster on the planet), and there must be decent sushi there somewhere. But if your friend is interested in experiencing, well, pretty much anything other than Memphis, then Memphis is a bad location to be based in. Drive an hour in any direction, and there ain't much of nothin'. I found Memphis itself to be way too laid back. Not just in general demeanor, but also in terms of things like work ethic, customer service, cleanliness, driving capability, and particularly racial harmony. Of course, this is a broad brush ... I made many friends in Memphis who were the complete opposite of all that. But in general, it really struck me just how much slack there was in the day-to-day operations of just about anything. Example: There were only a few fast food restaurants I considered safe to eat in, while most were a guaranteed case of the Mississippi Quick-Step. At one point when I was living there, Burger King suddenly and permanently shut down most of their local franchises completely because of all the hotline complaints and health code violations. Yep - literally abandoned the entire Memphis market rather than have their reputation suffer further damage. And you have not seen a truly messy Wal Mart until you've seen one in Memphis. Just about anyone in the area who is willing and able to do menial jobs well gets a much-better-paying job in the casinos in Tunica. It's the tensest city I've been in in terms of racism. The KKK and the Nation of Islam are both very visible there. I didn't personally know any Asians there, so I can't speak to that aspect, although I can tell you there weren't many of 'em. They also have the worst drivers in the USA, mainly because they are so aggressive. LA is SO much easier, simply because LA-ers don't want you to hit their car, whereas Memphians take deliberate aim. Traffic reports nearly always involve spontaneous car fires, or "clip" jobs that have been in a collision and broken in half. There are no cars in Memphis that are not dented in some way. None. I exaggerate not. Next time you're there, check it out and see if I'm lying. If you see a car with no dents, it's on a new car lot away from traffic. They do have FABULOUS barbecue, no question about that. Corky's rocks. There's a great local music scene, both in and out of the Beale Street touristy area. The Memphis in May Sunset Symphony is one of those weird and wonderful experiences you just gotta have before you die. And the locals' attitude toward Elvis is a hoot ... most of them go way out of their way to demonstrate that he means NOTHING to them, even calling the annual graveside festivities at Graceland "Dead Elvis Week." If she's reading this and fearing for her life right about now, tell her to chill out, stay genki, it isn't that bad if she stays out of the roughest areas. She should just hook up with a local that can show her the ropes and help her over the culture shock for the first few weeks at least. Also explain to her what a manically depressed LP poster I am. Why the heck is she moving to Memphis? Sounds like Southern California would be paradise for her. Beaches, mountains, Hollywood, Disneyland, and several good-sized Japanese communities should she get homesick. And she can eat at McDonalds without having an ambulance on call.
Originally Posted By Lisann22 Not to join you AS things are starting to feel much more comfortable to me. However, you just described what it has felt like to move to Atlanta for me. I know it's a much more progressive area than say Memphis but coming from California, the Bay Area, San Francisco I've had a lot of adjusting to do. I continue to be amazed at how hard it's been for me to adjust compared to when I moved to Chicago and feel instantly in love with that city. The South is just so so different. I do not mean that to be all negative. It does have a certain charm and that are areas that are absolutely beautiful but my day to day living is definitely a whole different experience. Things just feel constantly tense here, it's an eerie undercurrent and unless you are from somewhere else, it's hard to explain to the locals and I don't want to be offensive.
Originally Posted By mawnck Lisann ... I haven't lived in Atlanta, although I hear it's cool for the most part, and more cosmopolitan and a lot less "laid back" than Memphis as I described it above. You'll find that the way people deal with what you're experiencing is ... they just do. You assume that everything is going to be fine unless proven otherwise, and also assume that the person you're interacting with is assuming the same thing. And it turns out, they usually are. If you have problems somewhere, you mark that down as "stay away from." And you'll find that as you make good friends, regardless of their race or political views, you can safely broach those "problem subjects" without being nervous about how you're going to be responded to. The eerie undercurrent is there in the bigger world, but it melts away in "your" circles, and is usually just worked around everywhere else. There are going to be those moments ... like when, to our horror, my family's favorite barbecue restaurant in Columbia SC, which we'd been patronizing for years, suddenly started displaying KKK recruitment literature in their lobby ... but they aren't that frequent. I had a good friend and co-worker at the TV station I was working at during the OJ Simpson trial, and she would literally be standing at her post in the control room screaming at the monitors about how grossly unfair those awful people were being to OJ. Kind of freaked me out, but she was a good friend, a wonderful person, and I could talk to her about anything, even OJ Simpson, and we were cool. Once you get the hang of this weird interaction, you'll get along fine. I lived all my life in the South prior to moving to Southern California, and I can assure you the culture shock works both ways, although given my predilections I probably adapted faster than most Southerners would. Especially coming straight from Memphis, which I was not very sorry to leave. Southerners in general really are friendlier, warmer, and a LOT less superficial than Californians. Sorry, Californians, but it's true. They don't call this part of the country Plastic-land for nothing. It's just a different culture with different values, and not all of them are superior. I should tell you that after 12 years, I finally got me a really good barbecue sandwich in California for the first time ... YESTERDAY. ( <a href="http://scottiessmokehouse.com/" target="_blank">http://scottiessmokehouse.com/</a> in case anyone is wondering.) So enjoy all the barbecue you can while you're in Atlanta. Cheerwine too. ;-)
Originally Posted By Mr X ***Why the heck is she moving to Memphis?*** It's not by choice. Her husband is going there to work for a year (and he'll be out of the house a LOT, perhaps 6 days a week, and she has nothing to do BUT apparently will have access to a car). I'll have to remember to mention the barbque. She said she wants to try catfish, is Memphis the place to find that?
Originally Posted By mawnck >>I never implied I wasn't dealing with it.<< No offense was intended. >>She said she wants to try catfish, is Memphis the place to find that?<< It's not something they're necessarily famous for, but yes, there are quite a few restaurants there that specialize in it. <a href="http://maps.google.com/maps?oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-USfficial&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&q=catfish+in+memphis&fb=1&split=1&gl=us&view=text&ei=7XbsSZ21HZnqtAPn2NXfAQ&sa=X&oi=local_group&resnum=1&ct=more-results&cd=1" target="_blank">http://maps.google.com/maps?oe...lts&cd=1</a>
Originally Posted By A Happy Haunt <-misses Atlanta BBQ. this place was our Fav! <a href="http://www.menuism.com/restaurants/cSN7EKRMir26RAabBlKsEs-pappy-reds-barbeque-cumming-ga" target="_blank">http://www.menuism.com/restaur...mming-ga</a>
Originally Posted By Chris in Atlanta Well, hummm. I will certainly and swiftly dismiss out of hand the notion of any significance of the KKK. It is 2009 here too. And the Southern States are very conservative. You have to consider your source and I do NOT mean that direspectfully. I was born and raised here. I've lived most of my life here. I did live in the Midwest during the mid 90's for 3 years, and it just wasn't home, but I made the most of it. So of course you will get mostly positive from me. If your friend is the kind of person that will embrace differences and try to play nice with friends, I think she will enjoy it. If she moves to Memphis already thinking she's going to hate it, she will be miserable. I think Lisann has some good comments though about Atlanta. I don't disagree with a thing she has said. As for comments about Memphis, I've never lived there, and Branson might be smaller, but Memphis isn't like Atlanta, Chicago, San Fran, Dallas etc... and it's a long drive to "those" places.
Originally Posted By RoadTrip We've found the people in Branson to be wonderfully friendly. They will go out of their way to help you in ways you would not frequently find elsewhere. We bought a condo in Branson last summer that we will be retiring to this summer. Our real estate agent has been wonderful; checking our home every few weeks to make sure everything is in order. Last January she found a pipe that had developed a leak so she shut off the water supply and called a plumber to fix it. She didn't want us to have to deal with arranging for a plumber because she knew of Rosie's illness and did not want to add any stress. On the other hand I've come to terms with the fact that a pretty fair number of people there exhibit what I would consider prejudice against minorities and gay people. Of course they don't see it as prejudice. They think gay PEOPLE are fine. They just HATE them acting on it. Hate the sin; love the sinner and all that. They think black PEOPLE are fine. But they HATE people collecting welfare and having children out of wedlock and all kinds of other things that statistically happens to black people more often. Again, hate the sin; love the sinner. They believe that so sincerely that they truly do not see the prejudice behind it. The thought process is certainly different than what I'm used to in Minnesota. Fortunately, Branson has attracted MANY people, especially retirees, from other states. This tends to provide a little more diversity of thought than you might find otherwise. We've met some of our new neighbors and they are from Michigan, Florida and Wisconsin. Not a native to be found (yet)! Of course it is very easy to avoid any and all problems. You just don't discuss politics or religion with anyone. And frankly, that is a pretty darned good idea no matter WHERE you live.
Originally Posted By mawnck >>I will certainly and swiftly dismiss out of hand the notion of any significance of the KKK. It is 2009 here too.<< Shrug. <a href="http://www.newschannel5.com/global/story.asp?s=8806773" target="_blank">http://www.newschannel5.com/gl...=8806773</a>
Originally Posted By TXDISNEYNERD I just wanted to recommend the Rendezvous. It is the best BBQ ever!!! Even in the book The Firm, that is where they go and eat BBQ. And Graceland is definitely a must see in my opinion. I have only been to Memphis a handful of times, but I enjoyed it.
Originally Posted By mawnck >>You might want to reread the link. << Howso? It was an African American candidate accusing his white opponent of supporting the Klan. If that's not a town where racial tension is alive and well, I don't know what it is. But if you would like some more links ... <a href="http://www.splcenter.org/blog/2008/02/14/hate-radio%E2%80%99s-%E2%80%98political-cesspool%E2%80%99-to-shut-down/" target="_blank">http://www.splcenter.org/blog/...ut-down/</a> <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/11/13/obama-plot-skinhead-wants_n_143630.html" target="_blank">http://www.huffingtonpost.com/...630.html</a> <a href="http://blackgirlthinking.wordpress.com/2008/11/06/kkk-white-power-meeting-being-held-in-the-midsouth/" target="_blank">http://blackgirlthinking.wordp...idsouth/</a> <a href="http://www.myeyewitnessnews.com/news/local/story/David-Dukes-EURO-Conference-Meets-in-Memphis/g0d48N-ouUiChRnyJoWVzQ.cspx" target="_blank">http://www.myeyewitnessnews.co...VzQ.cspx</a> <a href="http://www.commercialappeal.com/news/2009/mar/19/forrest-park-on-historic-register/" target="_blank">http://www.commercialappeal.co...egister/</a> <a href="http://www.roadsideamerica.com/news/10904" target="_blank">http://www.roadsideamerica.com...ws/10904</a> <a href="http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,266120,00.html" target="_blank">http://www.foxnews.com/story/0...,00.html</a> <a href="http://www.commercialappeal.com/news/2008/apr/06/hot-button-sunday/" target="_blank">http://www.commercialappeal.co...-sunday/</a>
Originally Posted By Chris in Atlanta <<<It was an African American candidate accusing his white opponent of supporting the Klan.>>> Yes which President Obama himself dismissed as inappropriate. As for your other links, I never said that racism does not exist in Memphis or anywhere else for that matter. To claim such would be complete denial of the real world. But say what you want. You lived there, I have not. Of course I cannot remember the last time the KKK made real, news of any kind in the recent past. I suppose however there are things, rumors, histories, that about any geographical region will never shake.
Originally Posted By Chris in Atlanta >>>I suppose however there are things, rumors, histories, that about any geographical region will never shake. <<< that is... I suppose there are things, rumors, histories, and associations for most geographical regions that seem as if they will last forever. When I moved to the Midwest, the first year there, the entire company (and it was a huge corporation) was invited to participate in Black History Luncheon, which fell in February, which is our own National Black History Month in the USA. I went, had a great time, and was one of 4 "white" people that showed up. The other 300 or so were African American. It was a buffet lunch that several of the employees pitched in and cooked then served. At the time, I had been away from my hometown for over a year. The food was so good, I felt like I was home again and I told the people serving, that. That was my first inclination that things outside of The South aren't all they are cracked up to be when it comes to race relations. In fact over the course of the next three years I can tell you, it was far more segregated than it is here IMHO. The "you are fine as long as you stay over there" mentality was out right confusing to me. Since then, I tend to wrankle a bit when people comment in such as way as to suggest that The Southern States are more racially charged than other places. It is simply NOT the case at all. So that's where I'm coming from on the subject. I don't mean to get all up in arms at the mention of the KKK or anything else. Like I said, I have not lived in Memphis, but I don't believe it is much different than Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, and the rest of Tennessee. Of course, I could be wrong about all of this. After all its only one person's observation, and its very limited at that.
Originally Posted By Lisann22 I'll be back to discuss this. I agree to a certain point with Chris in Atlanta after being here awhile now, BUT... LOL!
Originally Posted By DVC_Pongo Lisann, Please do come back to discuss this. I would truly like to hear your take, impressions, comments, etc... and not in a spirit of bickering over things. You live here, and what you perceive is as valid (maybe even more so as I tend to live in a fishbowl way out in Suburbia) as what I perceive. I am not afraid of the truth. Things are what they are and I'll be the first to admit, my observations will be different from those of others'. mawnck, no offense intended. I hope I didn't come across as just wanted to take up the mantle of blind denial. You lived in Memphis. What you say about Memphis is certainly far more reliable than what I have to say with regards to race relations. Lisa? Are you there? mawnck?
Originally Posted By DVC_Pongo Oh this is Chris in Atlanta, DVC_dad, and this obvious name. I am going through an identity crisis. I think I'm going to settle with this one. I'm just trying to give SPP something to fuss at me over. jk SPP,
