Originally Posted By RoadTrip <<Don't you think a better judge of that would be someone who has done *both* rather than someone who says he'd like to be able to be a say at home parent?>> No, I don't. I said I didn't think it should be a 'contest', and here you are making it one. Fine.
Originally Posted By Autopia Deb I'm not making it a contest, I just think someone who has been a stay at home parent and work outside of the home parent is a better judge of which is more difficult than someone who hasn't experienced both situations. I've done them both and without benifit of a dad.
Originally Posted By DVC_dad Speaking as a stay home dad of young children, I have a lot to say on this mom issue. But first let me go finish cleaning the kitchen, bathe the kids, dress them in PJ's, put them to bed, change the clothes in two washing machines and four dryers, all while holding my 7 week old, oh and I should check on my wife to make sure she has everything she needs whie taking her nightly one hour, aroma therapy bath before she goes to bed. Then in an hour or so, after all that is done, I will come back and we will see how many people I can offend.
Originally Posted By CrouchingTigger The beach, cruises (like to Mexico), and sunny activities. I've spent 10 weeks with stitches in various parts of my face and back this year, so far. I'm giving the dermo too much business. My in-laws decide they want to take everyone on a 7 day cruise for their 50th anniversary. I don't care what they say, no sunblock stays on in 100 degree temps and near 100% humidity. I lock myself below decks and only come out at night, so I do only one on-shore activity in the whole time. Bleh. Curse the evil yellow face! It burns us! Yes, it burns us, my precioussssssss.
Originally Posted By TALL Disney Guy <oh and I should check on my wife to make sure she has everything she needs whie taking her nightly one hour, aroma therapy bath before she goes to bed.> That's fine, but as she works and *you* are the stay-at-home parent, I hope you get a little "me time" as well! ;-)
Originally Posted By DVC_dad On a fast note as I RUUUN past...... I was a Financial Planner at a major corp before the career change. Gotta go!
Originally Posted By chickendumpling ^^^ hey! check me out! Trying to get back on topic! LOL! Another thing that I knows angers some... overuse of exclamation points!!! ;-P
Originally Posted By chickendumpling (not that I'm trying to annoy anyone on purpose, I was just making a joke.)
Originally Posted By DVC_dad Ahhhh.... ok. STAYING HOME vs. JOB I was planning on going into this long drawn out detailed narrative of my typical day...as a stay home dad of 6 young children. BUT I decided to skip all that. This analogy came to mind and I think it's perfect. We can ALL relate to this. STAYING HOME WITH CHILDREN IS LIKE A TRIP TO DL OR WDW. You know how like you go to the parks and you walk all day long, maybe you drag your kids around, or follow an over zealous spouse all day riding rides, eating, WALKING on and on and on. Maybe you walk 8 or 10 miles in a given day at the parks over several hours. What is funny is, if you were to do that back home, like around your neighborhood or in your city, you would collapse of a heart attack or maybe a stroke and DIE. BUT...the one great equalizer is .... IT'S FUN !!! And you ain't at WORK!!! You have less STRESS!!! So staying home with kids is JUST like that. It may be a lot harder work than you would do physically or emotionally or psychologically, but it's still HOME. You are still WITH YOUR CHILDREN. Sure you are on the job 24/7. But you are having SOME fun, and SOME good times, just like when you are at the parks! So staying home with kids ... yes it is certainly HARDER work, but just like being at DL or WDW turns you into a super-human who can, in spite of never getting exercise, walk 8 or 10 miles, chase kids, eat lots of food, and keep going on and on like the Energizer Bunny.... so is staying in one's OWN HOME, taking care of one's OWN KIDS, as one wants to. Honestly, I think RoadTrip said it all in his post. <<<Do I think stay-at-home moms have it easy? No way. If I had the chance to be a stay-at- home dad would I take it? In a minute. Parenting for the most part is less stressful and much more rewarding than a "real" job.>>> That great equalizer is that one tiny word with a massive meaning...STRESS. Now you have to know, I am home with kids of the following ages. 11, 7, 5, 3, 2 and 7 WEEKS old. I do everything, except lactate that any other mom would do. But I can honestly say, I work much harder than I did when in career mode, but I have very little stress here. And the rewards are well...indescribable. I have probably spent more time, even on an individual basis with each of my 6 children, than most dads get to spend with their children in two lifetimes. I don't know what I did to deserve to stay home with my kids, and you moms know there are also many down sides to it, but in the end...I am extremely fortunate and I think of it every single day. I wouldn't trade it for the world. And I honestly don't know a lot of people who COULD do it...men or women. It took me over a year to come to terms with two major things. 1.) You NEVER complete anything. It's like constant maintenance. You just do the same tasks over and over forever. There is no sense of accomplishment. 2.) You are NEVER off. You are on 24/7. If one gets sick during the night, you go in and clean, medicate, and stand watch all night long. If you go out to dinner, you are the one making the kids behave. If they fall down and get hurt...who do they run to? Who helps with the homework when the working spouse comes in to tired to do so? So in conclusion, It's THANKLESS, never ending, and weary work, but the rewards are worth it. You cannot possibly know what it is like until YOU do it. It's the worst of the worst and the best of the best. It's not a contest at all. I can't think of anything I would rather do.
Originally Posted By Mrs 2oon I've actually been on both side of the fence here. I worked for the same company full-time for 21 years and then was "downsized" in January '02. At the time my kids were in 2nd and 5th grades. Since then I have been home. Neither situation is easy. When you're employed you hear snide comments from the stay-at-home moms and when you stay at home you hear it from the employed moms. It's just a decision that one has to make for their own personal situation. While I was employed I gained valuable skills that help me manage a household. I am very fortunate to be able to stay home right now but I do look forward to returning to the work force after I finish my degree. Actually, being "downsized" was a very positive thing for me. After the initial adjustment period of being home I realized how much I hated my job and the insurance industry as a whole.
Originally Posted By TALL Disney Guy This keeps remindin' me of "Designing Women"... Episode - Working Mother: "Resentment builds between Charlene and Mary Jo when Charlene wants to take a year off to look after her baby. The decorators cater to the whims of a rich, insufferable 10-year-old client as Mary Jo and Charlene ponder the joys and pitfalls of working mothers and stay-at-home moms."
Originally Posted By TALL Disney Guy Lol I've got it on tape...and I love how there's a subplot of Nintendo in there, and a mention of Super Mario Brothers 3 by name! lol <---well-stocked in his sitcom library, with continuin' growth
Originally Posted By RoadTrip Re #72 Thanks DVC_dad for expressing well (and from experience) what I meant but was apparently unable to make clear.
Originally Posted By sherrytodd I think that just being a responsible parent period is one of the toughest jobs whether you work or stay at home. Got this from my dad today... PARENT- Job Description POSITION : Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa JOB DESCRIPTION : Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities! Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required. RESPONSIBILITIES : The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility. POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION : None. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE : None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis. WAGES AND COMPENSATION : Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more. BENEFITS : While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.
