Originally Posted By melekalikimaka I nursed both of my children in public but I always had a blanket or cloth to cover myself up with. Of course, I never plopped right down next to a stranger and lifted my shirt either. (Well, not for nursing purposes. HA!) There are some people who cannot stand the idea of a woman nursing in public no matter how modestly she does it. These are the people I don't care about offending. I've got a whole laundry list of things I don't like to see people doing in public and they are a lot less sanitary and lacking in modesty than a mother feeding her hungry baby. Also many department stores have "lounges" in their ladies room or have a separate little room for nursing and/or changing your baby. I always tried to use those rooms above all else. At least now I know why there are couches in some public restrooms.
Originally Posted By cstephens pennyring wrote: > If you're walking through the mall and some woman hikes her shirt up and takes out her boob Then I would consider that flaunting it in your face. Most mothers that I see lift their shirt up just enough to let the baby latch, but that's just my experience. /cs
Originally Posted By LuLu This topic would be funny, if it weren't so sad. I don't have a problem with nursing in public. Did anyone in this thread really say it was disgusting or dirty? I think it CAN be done without exposing yourself. Especially after sitting down next to a stranger.
Originally Posted By Kimrue Nobody SAID it was disgusting or dirty, but I do feel an implication is being made here. Somebody related it to watching someone eat with their mouth open and food being exposed. Stating over and over again that this person should've gone to a "private place." Why is it that a breast fed baby should SCREAM THEIR HEADS OFF in hunger while mom tries to find a more private place as to not make others uncomfortable. If this were done, people would be looking at them like "do something with your kid!" If you have actually SEEN someone's breast. By all means, be as offended as you want. But when I flat out asked if the op had seen an actual *breast* all he said was "he could see enough." It was a yes or no question...to me, this tells me that perhaps he was simply uncomfortable with the situation, and yes, fine, move...but to think it's inappropriate or she should've gone somewhere else. I don't see why. I have breastfed 2 children for awhile. I can nurse with not only my breast covered but my belly too WITHOUT "covering up." You literally cannot see a stitch of skin. MOST mother's that I have come across do the EXACT same thing that I do. Very rarely do I see any skin, much less a BREAST hanging out! The fact that their are 80 posts about breastfeeding a baby in public, mostly saying that this person should've "gone somewhere else." What about applauding jafar for being a gentlemen and allowing her to sit, instead of agreeing with the fact that he should've been offended. The reason why I'm so put out by the tone of this topic is because I've totally "been there" a new mom, still learning how to breastfeed...hovering over a disgusting toilet bowl in a public restroom, while my baby SCREAMED because of the odor, gagging while trying to nurse...but I guess that's what I should've done, right? So no one else was "offended." What ever happend to compassion?
Originally Posted By Jafar30 <<hovering over a disgusting toilet bowl in a public restroom, while my baby SCREAMED because of the odor>> Hey I would be screaming because of the odor. And no I don't think this woman should have gone to the bathroom. The mall I was at there's a little back area where they have lockers(like at a train station) and restrooms. I'm not sure if there's a couch back there. Let me ask you this what if she had done it at say Applebee's during their dinner time?
Originally Posted By cstephens I can't tell if the objections are that she was breastfeeding in public at all or that she was breastfeeding without being covered. If the difference was that she did have a cloth or something over her shoulder so you couldn't see anything, would people still be saying she should go to the bathroom/car/corner? /cs
Originally Posted By Jafar30 My objection is that it made for a real uncomfortable situation. She wasn't covered up. I probably would have never noticed if she had a towel over her, but she didn't.
Originally Posted By MrToadWildRider >>Toad, (and everyone else who feels that public breastfeeding is disgusting)<< That's from post 48 - I never once said or hinted at it being "Disgusting" - I just said a woman should do it modestly and try to shield those around her from it through either finding a more secluded place (and I said bathroom because as I understand it most women's bathrooms have some form of seating - sometimes specifically designed for nursing) or atleast have wome sort of cloth or other garment to cover up. To those making the comparison between cleavage and full exposed breast they are different things. What about a man wearing a speedo and a man exposing his genitals? You're going with the it's close enough argument so I think that's a fair comparison. I also find it insulting that some members are posting we only think that it's inappropriate because the woman is a mother and not some sexy "20-something" year old - that's just wrong. I've seen plenty of women who definately do not fall under either of the "sexy" or "20-something" categories wearing low cut dresses exposing their cleavage and while I don't particularly find the sight appealing I still don't think it's the same ball park as someone exposing their full breast. Please don't try to pin us as sexists or something because we don't find someone who may be somewhat scantily clad despite their appearance being the same as someone being fully exposed. Another thing, what's with this the breast is not a sexual organ mindset? Yes, it is. It is instinctually in humans to seek out desirable mates as it is in all animals. Breasts are intended to feed children but in that they are also a symbol of fertility which is linked to what our brain tells us is a good mate. To say they aren't intended as a way to get sexual attention goes against science and what is known about animal behavior. But as humans we try to be civilized and not live in a society that resembles the Serngeti Plains and in that is the reason why it is fair to expect a bit of modesty in public. We wear clothes for a reason. Please breastfed, I'm a big supporter of it as it is the healthiest choice and most natural - but please use a bit of discretion and privacy.
Originally Posted By TomSawyer It could be that some men are uncomfortable with the idea that breasts are more than just something fun and nice to look at. A friend of mine is that way - he doesn't want to see breastfeeding because he doesn't want that image of women's breasts in his mind. I can't wait until he has a kid and sees his wife using a breast pump.
Originally Posted By TomSawyer >>Let me ask you this what if she had done it at say Applebee's during their dinner time? << I'd be offended that the kid is eating at the grown-up table instead of the kid's table.
Originally Posted By Big Thunder Being a parent of a breast fed baby, remembering what it was like raising a baby in today's world, I kinda understand and respect the woman's choice to breast feed in public. I have been in the exact situation before, looking over and noticing that a mother is feeding her baby. I must admit, it's a bit of an awkward situation. A part of me knows it's totally natural and all that, but another part of me is uncomfortable because I wonder "oh gee does she think I'm staring at her? I don't want to make HER uncomfortable" Also, I am thinking, there is probably a culture or country where this is totally acceptable with no hang ups, maybe the women comes from a such place? But I realize this is the USA and exposed breasts are still less acceptable socially.
Originally Posted By Jafar30 <<But I realize this is the USA and exposed breasts are still less acceptable socially.>> Not at Cheetah's
Originally Posted By Lisann22 I also think several of us have repeatedly said in this thread that WE would move, not expecting the mom to move. Just as Jafar did.
Originally Posted By Jafar30 ^^^Thank you I never told her she disgusts me. I never even mentioned anything to her. I just left.
Originally Posted By MrToadWildRider >>What about applauding jafar for being a gentlemen and allowing her to sit, instead of agreeing with the fact that he should've been offended. << Because he asked a question in the title regarding the appropriateness of her actions - not whether he was right or wrong. >> can't tell if the objections are that she was breastfeeding in public at all or that she was breastfeeding without being covered. If the difference was that she did have a cloth or something over her shoulder so you couldn't see anything, would people still be saying she should go to the bathroom/car/corner? << I can't speak for everyone else but I was saying she should go someplace more private if she didn't have anything to cover up with. In my original post I made mention of using some sort of garment to cover up. Is that really so much to ask? If you didn't bring it then yes I do think they should find someplace more private. The analogy of eating with your mouth open - that's exactly what I'M saying which is funny how it's being used as an argument to not have to cover up. You said it's rude and no one wants to see it - exactlly no one (well mostly no one maybe) wants to see some woman pulling her engorged breast out and having their kid suck on her nipple the same as you don't want to see someone eating with their mouth open. They SHOULDN'T be exposing you to them eating disgustingly. I don't want to see either of them in public personally - is that so wrong to ask people not to do them? If you want to eat in public go ahead but do it in a polite manner - don't throw your food wrappers on the floor, don't chew with your mouth open, and don't whip your breast out in the mall atrium.
Originally Posted By Big Thunder <"and don't whip your breast out in the mall atrium."> now wait a minute dont be hasty.. depends on the situation
Originally Posted By Big Thunder <"and don't whip your breast out in the mall atrium."> now wait a minute dont be hasty.. depends on the situation
