Originally Posted By Labuda Thanks as always for the support, all. And, I still maintain I'm a statistic! OTOH, I *think* it's about 6 weeks since the last date I went on and ytou know what? I really don't care. I'm much more focused on the fact that I've surpassed 3 months in my attempt to become a non-smoker and am still successful with that. AND, each and every HIV test I've done since finding out about my ex's infidelity has been negative, and I'm pretty confident that the one I get next week will be, too! WOO HOO! Anyhow, much love to all of you for the words of encouragement!
Originally Posted By iamsally I just feel compelled to give three cheers out to anyone who has quit or is trying to quit smoking.... HIP-HIP-HOORAY HIP-HIP-HOORAY HIP-HIP-HOORAY I have read these posts and do not really have anything new to add. I feel for you as a loss is something that hurts even if it is for the better. Best wishes as you move on to another phase of life.
Originally Posted By tinkerbell1962 Labuda, perhaps we could start a statistics support group? "Hi, I'm tink62 and I'm a statistic." My ex happened to call today to inform my girls that their older brother (their dad's from his first marriage who they haven't seen or heard from in about 12 years) is going to be a daddy. Really, who cares? He was surprised that we didn't jump for joy. My oldest just looked at me and said she wouldn't know him if he knocked on our door tomorrow. Dumb, yes, just plain dumb.
Originally Posted By disney pete ann i am so happy that you have been set free your happiness comes over here on the boards and it's a delight to hear good luck miss single LPer 2009.
Originally Posted By JazzCat When you think about it, everybody's a statistic. I'm obese (statistic) I'm diabetic (statistic) I have high blood pressure (statistic) I could go on and on but I think you get my drift.
Originally Posted By KCCHIEF I wish you nothing but the best....I guess I am really naive..my divorce was final 12-12-08 and I had no idea until 01-03-2009 why my husband left in July........(just up and walked out the door).....anyway, I happened to be going into the local grocery store that night and a woman was coming out with his work coat on (his name was on it) and we got to talking and yeah.........it was not good........seems my husband had been seeing her for quite a long time.....she claims that she did not know he was married. She works with him and was GPSing him to our address every nite in his work van....but, yeah she did not know he was married. All I can say is they deserve each other. But, the pain for me is still there and anger and sometimes I just want to scream. I know in my head that it all is for the best, but, try telling my foolish heart. Sheila
Originally Posted By Labuda Sheila, I urge you to sek help if you think you may need it. Within days of my ex and I deciding to split, I called up my old psychiatrist and made an appointment. And believe you me, having her came in VERY handy when I found out about the cheating. ((Sheila))
Originally Posted By KCCHIEF I am in divorce recovery and I am learning that all the emotions that come and (glady go) are all "normal"..........what Joe did was unforgivable.....if he had only been honest--then I could have dealt with that....but, his lies to me for months and then the cheating on top of it....AWG!!!!....he never wanted me to find out about the other woman.....actually, when you think about it...he was a very busy person (leading 2 lives in a way)....but, the lies ........oh my gosh.......so many.....I would have passed out cold if he had shown in court with her.....he actually came to me the 9th of December and begged me to not go thru with the divorce.......I wanted to believe him that we could still make it work and I am so glad that I did not fall for one more of his lies. Remember, I did not know about her. anyway, I will be okay...I have my son (thank God!)...this has so affected him....he misses his dad so much.....Joe is also an alcoholic. he is not seeing Tarik at all right now.
Originally Posted By gottaluvdavillains Not to be blunt but, Please make sure you get tested for STD's especially HIV if you haven't already. If he cheated once there is a good chance he cheated more. Better to be sure than to wonder - When I found out my x had cheated I felt so much better after being tested and found to be healthy!
Originally Posted By KCCHIEF I did that in September and again 2 weeks ago.......I was sweating both times when I went in for my results....I am negative......and I thank God for that. I think that I still walk around in like a cloud. I still have periods that I cannot believe that this has really happened and I am going to wake up and it all will be a nightmare and all will be the same and okay.
Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter Man, Sheila, I am so sorry for all you've been through. It absolutely sucks. Thank goodness you are healthy regarding STDs. As horrible as this has been (and still is, I'm sure), it sounds like you are far better off without this guy. In time the pain will pass, and you will be happy. Hard to see that now, but you're on your way to a much better life. Please feel free to vent here whenever. . . LP is such a supportive online family.
Originally Posted By LuLu {{{Sheila}}} I'm so sorry honey. Take care of yourself. You deserve better! (and being alone is better than being with a cheating creep - but I understand that it still hurts like heck!!)
Originally Posted By avromark ((all around)) It really makes me disgusted by this. I currently choose to be single because I don't consider myself worthy for a relationship of that depth at this time. Like do you really need to cheat and add double injury? If you want out (for why I can't see) why not end it properly first before starting again? I really hope that when I marry it's for life. But it seems less and less likely these days. Also uh for these partners in homewrecking, why do you continue? If I was dating someone and found out they were currently married, I don't think at that time I'd be too interested in pursuing the relationship in any form. But who knows? Maybe I'm weird.
Originally Posted By Labuda "Not to be blunt but, Please make sure you get tested for STD's especially HIV if you haven't already. If he cheated once there is a good chance he cheated more. Better to be sure than to wonder - When I found out my x had cheated I felt so much better after being tested and found to be healthy!" AMEN to that. My ex swears up and down that he used a condom each time he cheated on me, but why the HE-double-hockey-sticks should I believe a man WHO VIOLATED MY TRUST in the worst possible way? UH UH!
Originally Posted By Labuda Avro - don't let this scare you off a relationship. Sheila & I just managed to snag a couple of losers. By far, most marriages don't end like this. On another note, last night I had a girls night out with some friends and once again I had people telling me how happy they were I was finally rid of Eric. Man, that's a good feeling. hehe Oh, and as for why the homewreckers continue, I have NO idea. BUT, I can get you the name, address, and number of the ho that MY ex cheated with most often if you'd like. heh
Originally Posted By avromark Uh no, you might have read my views on topics like this may be more extreme then others. Ie. I don't believe in pre-marital sex. Heh. (And I don't admonish those who view otherwise which is basically most people). And no I don't wear a chasity ring or even voice my opinion on it face to face. The way I look at it though, the real winner in this is you. I can't imagine that Eric's new relationship is exactly based on the best bedrock. But if she's ok with him screwing around on a married woman. They deserve each other. Also at this point you can be pretty happy when the almost inevitable happens. (2 years from now, "I'm so sorry Eric to hear you now have full blown AIDs...")
Originally Posted By KCCHIEF I saw my EX on Saturday----I am at the bank---ordering new checks, debit card with my new last name.......and he shows up there (can you believe the timing?) and makes the biggest scene---because he is getting a cashier check for my payment for the month........let this be a lesson learned.....if you get divorced---have it in writing---that any monies owed and due you--should come in the mail. He was trying to tell me that he couldn't afford his house and pay me also and that since talking to me----his girlfriend is about done with him...(so sorry about that one)........yeah, anyway....I just listened--because, I realize that I don't care to respond to anything he has to say to me anymore. He gets mad and throws the check at me while he is exiting the bank.......wow!!
Originally Posted By Pixie Glitter What a loathsome little toad. Can you get your lawyer to rewrite the terms of alimony delivery so that you don't have to see him again?
Originally Posted By gottaluvdavillains I will just say "Good For You" you took the high road and didn't let him get to you. You let him say his peice and didn't fire back... You have shown who the better person is just by not saying a word!
